Too Big a Whiner?

Collective Foal

Collective Foal

Well-known member
I'm tired of getting this kind of thing from everybody and I want to know how to fix it. Today, while on Skype, I started out talking to a group of friends. Then, everybody sort of went their seperate ways and I was kind of left there to myself. I just posted continuously into the chat because I was feeling low and wanted to see if someone came on and might try to cheer me up. I admit I do want attention from others a lot, but I feel it's not too much to ask when I live on a total social island. So after a long time of just me talking and talking and talking, another guy said this:

Zach, I'm tired of watching this, and I'm just going to say it. I don't know you, but honestly, sometimes you just need to shut the fuck up. You're constantly whining and trying too hard to be cool. To be frank, it just feels like you're whoring for attention. People stopped caring a long time ago.

So I want to know how I can do better about this. Things like the vent thread or journas don't help me at all because I know there's usually nobody at the other end. I understand that recieving negative messages for like a half hour will irritate someone. But I get all these thoughts in my head and I just feel like I have to share them with someone or I'll just explode. If you guys can help me out, that would be great.

 
It sounds like you need a best friend. I'm not saying you don't have friends, but it just sounds like you need one person to just talk to. If you have this reputation, then refrain from talking like that in groups.

 
That was actually, ironically, one of the things I was complaining about. My one nearby friend is socially uncomfortable and he can't handle those kinds of pressures that I throw on him when I talk to him. My other friends that I can talk to come and go quickly. They're usually seniors or they move or they turn into jerks. I know what youean and I do try, but best friends are hard to come by and with how superficial and cardboard cutout people at school are like, I can't find any decent people to talk to.

See, right there, I feel like I was complaining a lot. I just don't know. I try to explain something and I go off on a tangent and become insufferable.

 
I don't mind that kind of stuff, in fact I kind of like it, hearing about the shit others go throw makes me fell better about my life. If you want you could pm my that stuff, or I could give you my number and you could text me it. I'll try to respond to it all with stuff that would help you with your problems, or at lest make you lol. Note many of comments may have something (or every thing) to go with tenticals

 
1. I'll always be here for you, I love ya bro, Feel free to Steam chat with me, etc.

VoW9czgQBqE

2. Have you considered trying facebook? You'll be able to keep up with distant friends and kepp a line between local friends who may turn jerk. Lots of people post their problems on facebook, so it's unlikely you'll get called out for it, but people who do get tired of it will just stop checking whereas people who do care won't.

3. Get out of the "social island." Investigate school cliques you may be welcomed in, try to meet friends of friends, don't say no when you're asked if you want to do something, and, if you can, join a local brony group.

4. What Ian said. If a best friend doesn't work, find a relative (closer the better).

5. If you can't complain less, complain better/more efficiently. If someone doesn't want 2 pages of complaining, maybe they'd be okay with a few sentences. Try and make your thoughts sipler and smaller, and only go in depth if they show an interest in it. It will not only lessen the amount of complaining you do without lessening the number of complaints, but rephrasing problems will often give you yourself better insight into them.

5. Ha! Now I know your real name.

 
1. Thank you both. I think that might actually be relevant to my problem, Whooves. I love to hear about other peoples' problems (moreso that I can make them feel better by offering helpful words than feeling better about my life) that I tend to assume that all my other friends love to hear my problems as well, which is obviously wrong.

2. My mom took my Facebook password like a year ago and never gave it back
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3. What I meant is we literally live isolated from most of the town. We're surrounded by some of the most dangerous highways in the state and I still can't drive alone (besides, driving with my dad has made me learn to hate it
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)

And believe me, I jump at the opportunity to do something with anyonr. We have a pool, so I can now invite the Sax section in Marching Band for a party.

But yea, I have my venting phases where I just have to let of steam and I don't realize who's in the blast radius. Thank you both for offering up your souls to be tortured by my teenaged girl rants
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I spent the last half hour trying to come up with a decent pun about letting of steam with Steam, but none hit the high bar of comedic quality that I have set upon myself.

 
Yeah, I can't think of any either. Maybe something involving Valve in the joke? Meh, how bout we just make a tasteless GAYBEN joke and call it quits?

 
Well, Mr. ShinyObject has said pretty much everything I was going to say, and like him, I'm another person you can chat with if you want, hit me up on Skype (psychotic.ninja) or Steam (or both) I'm free 98% of the time and I don't mind the chat. Also, Mr. Tyler (the name I'm giving to the jerk in your Skype chat) is a jerk (already said, but meh) first of all, he says he doesn't know you, then he says/types "it just feels like you're whoring for attention. People stopped caring a long time ago." Both sentences are lies, especially the second one. You don't nag or complain too much, dude it's good to vent it's good to let it all out. Society has spread lies about it being bad to vent, pardon my french, but those douchbags need to fucking leave! They have no right telling you you nag to much, they don't know you, especially Mr. Tyler. Look at all I've typed (and going to type) I could write a book on this (if I could perfect my grammar and writing skills). Anyhow you have friends who want to listen, who care, sure you don't know what we look like, and we don't know what you look like, but that's not the point, the point is we care 'cause we're your (online) friends. I would use scripture from the bible, but I'm not sure how comfortable you are on that subject (it's one of those things I avoid until I know my friends are fine with it). Again, if you need (another) person to talk to, I'm there for you. Oh lastly, with your reply to Ian, you didn't complain at all.

 
Well he later told me that it was kind of in consensus with the rest of my friends as well that I needed to stop and calm down elsewhere. I mean I know it's good to vent and all, but excessively doing so when people have frankly heard enough, is still kind of inconsiderate. I understand both sides equally now and believe I can make a good decision from it. Unless someone else needs it, request lock on thread.

 
It's not that hard, you just don't respond. XD

Seriously, though, I haven't been bothered by it. That's why the Vent thread and others have been made.

 
There's a guy, whom I consider my closest Internet friend but lately all he ever types to me about is his problems and when we've solved them then conversation's over. I'm glad that he trusts me but at the same time I just feel like tissue paper. I'm probably looking at this from the wrong angle, though.

 
There's a guy, whom I consider my closest Internet friend but lately all he ever types to me about is his problems and when we've solved them then conversation's over. I'm glad that he trusts me but at the same time I just feel like tissue paper. I'm probably looking at this from the wrong angle, though.
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Try talking to him more. Maybe that'll help.

 
I agree with Sir Ian, you need a Robin to listen to all your problems, but you can't just use people to listen to you complain all the time. I hate those friends that complain about everything to me, some shit I just don't care about.

What I do when I wanna complain is yell at people on xbox live while playin mw3. Not the best alternative, but meh.

 
Well, I also complain a lot, and like you, I really feel the need to do so (And actually enjoy doing so). But I try to be 'fair' about it. When I'm complaining to someone, I try my best to make it funny, so they'll actually not hate hearing it.

Ask Pinkie. He should know what I mean, since he's probably experienced it from me more than anyone.

 
You, Chuck, Shiny, Weebs, and I need to get together a lot more often.

I've already started to get better. I'm cutting myself off if I feel like I'm rambling about anything (Rambling always leads to complaints). Music serves as a great buffer for me to let my feelings go. I remember that it's inconsiderate to put stress on my friends with my minor problems. Thank you all so much. Jesus fuck, I love this forum.
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