Bullying (School)

[Kirkreng]

While I do agree that many schools do a very bad job of fighting bullying and some teachers seem to be mentally retarded at times. I do think that you should not go to hard on schools. Try putting yourselves in their shoes. When you, as a teacher, come to a fight and both are saying the other did it, it is kind of hard to choose which to punish. And while it sometimes may seem obvious who is the bully, things tend to not always be as they seem.

[Blue]

Children follow in the conduct of how they are taught to act and what rules they should obey. These are almost always a mix of the nature of their parents, friends, peers and the local laws or procedures of the institutions they attend.

Insuch, I think bullying is caused by the decisions of the individual child as a consequence of the conduct of their parents, and the behaviors of their peers (which would also be consequent of their parents).

 

I was a victim of bullying in school from about grade 3 to grade 7, and those were tough years although any sort of physical violence was entirely anomalous. Mostly verbal insults and emotional... come to think of it, the best word would be 'annoyance'. I could tell you a long list of stories but let's just say in the end I learned the meaning of the phrase "sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me". (An aside, words may not hurt you but they can change you. But the phrase only applies to insults.)

 

Getting back to the first thing I said, probably the best way to reduce bullying and change the moral conduct (or health habits, among a wide variety of other things that could be improved) of children would be more responsible and informed parents. A lack of education and leadership in that position is the cause of vast swathes of what can be called "The Problem of Youth Today".

[Razor235]

Last time I was REALLY bullied, he got his lesson. This kid would always try to fight me, mostly by starting to punch me. The thing is, is that he is was an idiot, and I was WAYYY smarter. So I told a teacher to watch and record a fight he was going to start. So once the kid approached me, the teacher started recording. I let him punch me and stuff. I was sitting down in a chair and he was standing up, so when he started to walk away. I grabbed the back of his head, and threw his face straight into a brick wall, he lost a tooth (they were adult teeth) and had to get stitches. The principle had called me in to explain and I had the video, so once he saw, he was on my side. The problem was the kid's parents. The prick tried to pull it on me, so I pulled out the video for them too. Apparently he had gotten away with a lot of crap before and his parents were so mad they sent him off to Canada to live with an aunt and uncle.

 

 

Like a BOSS!

[Doom Shepherd]

Threadicus Necromancum!

 

Foamy the squirrel has some helpful advice on dealing with bullying.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RZCUJEWuyow

[Darthvoorhees]

While I do agree that many schools do a very bad job of fighting bullying and some teachers seem to be mentally retarded at times. I do think that you should not go to hard on schools. Try putting yourselves in their shoes. When you, as a teacher, come to a fight and both are saying the other did it, it is kind of hard to choose which to punish. And while it sometimes may seem obvious who is the bully, things tend to not always be as they seem.

 

Yeah, when you see a teacher who SEES it going on, they see one student punching on another and do absolutely nothing about it. THEN the student being hit fights back only to try to defend themself, is when the teacher intervenes and punishes the both of you. When you experience THAT, then see if you still hold onto your opinion. Oh, and this happens WAY TOO OFTEN at my old school.

 

The subject is that if they're even HANDLING it. Most of the time, they're not handling it. They're not stopping it when it starts, yet they punish when the inevitable fight escalates.

 

What's worse is sometimes, even when a student is not hitting back (or even blocking), they'll still punish him for "fighting". This happened to my friend.

[Jek Jek Roo]

God, bless you because It has ended.

 

Where I live, we have first, elementary school (six years) after that we must go to gymnasium (three years) and after that we go to secondary school. I'm in the second year in secondary school and I think it's the best, most normal school I've ever was. People here tolerate each other more than in the last years of previous schools. Kids between 14-16 were monsters for me. They were jelaous and they hated me.

 

Yeah, I was bullied because I wasn't like others, I had my own opinion on things they didn't understand, I was better at english, drawing and teachers liked me more than other pupils. It doesn't sound like that, but trust me, those three years were awful.

Being a geek is hard when you're 14-16

 

I got changed at heart after that.

It took me a year to became more selfish, more silent and closed one. I learnt to be more quiet than be at the center everywhere because it brings only trouble. I didn't trust anybody thinking like the new people want to threat me again. It's hard for me to make new friends, I'm still a little paranoic 'bout that.

 

Of course, everyone wanted to help me but it was imposibble. Bullying is bad, I can't see any bloody sense in it, but it getting worse and worse.

Edited August 31, 2012 by Guest (see edit history)

[Kirkreng]

I agree. I used to be a hell of a lot more quiet and to myself too. But I decided that is not who I wanted to be so now I am annoyingly happy, positive and just plain weird. People don't seem to like that, but I just don't care.

[Scorpia]

Threadicus Necromancum!

 

Foamy the squirrel has some helpful advice on dealing with bullying.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RZCUJEWuyow

 

i was gonna post that XD i love foamy.

[Obsidian]

While I do agree that many schools do a very bad job of fighting bullying and some teachers seem to be mentally retarded at times. I do think that you should not go to hard on schools. Try putting yourselves in their shoes. When you, as a teacher, come to a fight and both are saying the other did it, it is kind of hard to choose which to punish. And while it sometimes may seem obvious who is the bully, things tend to not always be as they seem.

 

I'm not sure how it is in other schools in the states, but every high school I attended (about 8 of them , yikes) had security cameras installed and running 24/7 (I'm betting because of Columbine, but I also went to high school in a shady area). So, your scenario in the cases with schools that have cameras would be invalid, unless the fight happened in a bathroom/locker room. However, at those same schools, the policies regarding fights in general sucked. If you were caught in a fight, regardless of whom started it, both of you would be punished with the same punishment lasting the same amount of time. It was quite screwed up.

[Pinkie Pie]

If kids are commiting suicide because of bullying, FUCK NO it's not handled right. I homeschool on the computer now because I was sick of all the bullying in my school.

[Adam Stryker]

I am 23 years old and bullying then and bullying now has not changed. I do not know if the goverment here in the US cares about whats going on at the schools but its down right sick. But when I was in school it was fight the bully or get beat up. There was no Anti-bullying promo's to stop it. You had to stop it.

[Scorpia]

@Adam: uh huh, then they blame pretty much every one other than themselves when the victim decides to take retribution...not to mention the psychological damage.

 

 

@everyone and anyone feeling guilty after reading this: ever hear of The Bystander Effect? it's the phenomenon of watching an emergency situation unfold because you think someone else will intervene. oh, why step up for the child? someone else will. no, fuck that! you see this shit happen? throw your stupid fucking shame away and inter-fucking-vene! i swear, i get that bullies are goddamned retards, but the people who sit and watch?...there's just no fucking excuse for you.

 

sorry for the rant. that felt pretty good.

[Axeldeath]

I don't feel guilty because I always intervene :/ maybe not physically but if a fight is going down outside of school then I'll call the cops on them.

[ProHypster]

Really.... the cops? I mean if it's a mortal fight sure but a school fight?

[Axeldeath]

I just said if it's outside of school

[ProHypster]

Sorry, I understood it wrong as in outside, on the yard of school property.

But even outside fights sometimes need to happen, why call the cops? I would rather try to understand what's going on first. Even if it's mortal the cops are not going to be there in time, you would have to do somethign yourself.

 

@Billy I once talked to a guy who got bullied all the time and I tried to help him by explaining why he gets bullied and all he did is swear at me and say he wanted to get bullied when obviously he didn't... Anyway I found out that his parents were partially at fault and gave him medication which he wasn't supposed to take at one time or something (This was hearsay), I really didn't know what to do at that point so I just left it as it is. Calling cops on his parents could have ruined his life and he didn't let me go to him...

[Axeldeath]

But even outside fights sometimes need to happen

 

Why?

[ProHypster]

Because I had one... I couldn't resolve an issue where someone just took the football from me. What was I supposed to do? Call the cops because he stole my football and forget about the fact that I wanted to play the game that day? Anyway I said if he didn't show me where he put the football I would kick his ass and he said ok, let's fight then. We had a duel where I briefly kicked his ass and forced him to show me where the football was. By the way someone threatened to call the police like you would but I just ignored him. After the fight I played football with my friends.

 

Furthermore I know of a bunch of people who practice fight with each other with no intention to severely harm the other person but to train. They also happen to be in some of the most privileged leagues of proffesional fighting. So if you called the police before understanding what is really happening it would be very foolish from your side.

[Axeldeath]

IF they're professionals they should be training at their gym, boxing club etc.

 

I honestly don't care about the reasons, the people fighting can sort it out with the police.

[Doom Shepherd]

I was in a thing once where a crazy guy picked up a baseball bat and was going after a girl who had refused to return his obsessive stalkery "affection."

 

No time to call police, so I had to take him on myself - to give someone else enough time to GET the police. (Response time - not the greatest. Police have to solve crimes, they don't really prevent them unless they're right there.)

 

So, yeah, sometimes fights need to happen. What was I gonna do, stand there and let him whale on her?