Make-Believe Monster Manual

[Selfsurprise]

Made just because I inexplicably felt like making a new forum game thread.

 

Skorpenkopf, Large LE Magical Beast

Sinister, intelligent and ambitious monsters hailing from an infernally brutal desert of black sands. Skorpenkopf are rightly feared for their totalitarian dreams and their capacity for manipulating other equally sapient monsters into fighting on their behest.

 

Psiro, Small CG Fey (Air, Psionic)

Lithe and supernaturally nimble fairy worshippers of Chaav, the god of laughter, joy and pleasure. Unusually for fey, their agility is psychoportational in nature rather than being purely magical.

 

That Goddamn Tornado Sonuvabitch That Lives In The Cemetary, Annoyingly Big CWTF Elemental ("Seriously, An Angry Tornado With Arms?" Subtype)

This massive prick hangs around perfectly good cemetaries and makes a huge mess when gravediggers and ghouls alike are just trying to go about their business. One of the few monsters that will compel clerics and necromancers to work together.

 

~

 

Assuming you are still here and haven't been scared away by my teratologically inspired outburst, this aim of this game is simple! I'm sure some of you are fans of and/or familiar with Dungeons & Dragons, in particular the endlessly inspiring monsters manuals that many of us have, and still do, fondly thumb through. Every time someone participates in the thread they must post an image of a monster - the source of your image, photograph, illustration, etc. is up to you, let your imagination get the better of you! - and then the next poster needs to interpret it as some kind of D&D monster or race.

The kind of responses I'm hoping for might resemble the three above examples, though you needn't go into extreme detail, or provide an italicised description, or even take D&D's game mechanics seriously if you want to. Using the previous posters monster image simply provide us with a name for the creature (species or unique individual, as suits you) as well as the creature's size, alignment and type (see the handy collection of links below) and then post your own picture of an entirely new monster. If you aren't overtly familiar with D&D rule terminology then don't sweat it! I'm fine with humorous entries, most of all irreverent subtypes and alignments - "chaotic and lawful stupid" being perennial favourites.

 

Some topical aids for your perusal

A helpful list detailing monster types and subtypes

Wiki page about D&D's alignment system

Useful chart of monster sizes (including approximate height, weight, etc)

 

~

 

Next monster...

 

[Selfsurprise]

Just a heads up, even if nobody else posts in this thread I'll probably be updating it on a near daily basis anyway. I've been trying to come-up with a thread that will draw me back here on a regular basis, so even if you don't particularly want to post in this topic I'll still be posting my own ubiquitous strain of geeky obsessive weirdness therein. DECADES AGO I used to make homebrew monsters on the WotC forums and I've been hankering for some half-arsed made-up monster action for a while now. Onto the last image I posted...

 

Adumbralette, Huge CN Outsider (Chaotic, Extraplanar)

These winsome and powerful three-armed female giants reside in regions of the transitive cosmos where the astral and shadow planes intersect. A certain subset of multiplanar sages have theorized that in the same way dryads and oreads are spiritually connected to trees and waterfalls, an Adumbralette's essence in inextricably tied to portals connecting the two aforementioned planes.

 

Next monster...

 

[Selfsurprise]

^^^ Condemned Ascetic, Medium LE Undead (Incorporeal, Lawful)

Condemned Ascetics are the disembodied spirits of once noble monks guilty of slaughtering innocents with their martial arts. For their heinous crimes they cursed to haunt the material plane of existence, their hands and feet shackled by black ethereal chains, without hope of ever attaining the transcendental ascension all members of their class aspire to. Their day-to-day activities resemble a sad and futile parody of monastic routine - meditating fruitlessly, or tirelessly drilling themselves in various martial disciplines as in life.

 

Next monster...

 

[TheTron852]

^^^ Unstable Amalgamation

SIZE: Varies from Small to Huge

ALIGNMENT: Any Chaotic

TYPE: Undead

SUBTYPE: Golem

 

This is the result when the attempts to create a flesh golem with shapeshifting capabilities fail. These creatures cannot form into something coherent, so instead they morph into horrifying mix of various creatures and their body parts, most of them being human or humanoid. Due to their nature, they repel the concept of order and almost fully embrace chaos, but they can vary from good or evil, depending on what they experience in their first hours of being created.

One of the wizards, who were tasked to study one such creature, wondered whether any of them are like Robin Hood. He was quickly forbidden from raising such questions because "the presence of this amalgamation alone is affecting them mentally, and they don't need such imagery to break their minds".

[Selfsurprise]

^ Thanks Tron! I love the idea of a sapient and unstable flesh golem, that's certainly one way to interpret the image. You were supposed to post a new picture for the next player, but don't sweat it. If there anything I'm not short of in life it's pictures of weird and unspeakably eldritch abominations from beyond the rational bounds of earthly sanity.

 

Next monster...

 

[Selfsurprise]

^^^ Capganger, Diminutive CN Fey

Capgangers are an increasing menace in both larger metropolitan cities and more modest townships bordering on sylvan woodlands. Distantly related to the far more bloodthirsty Redcaps and bearing a mild resemble to gnomes, Capgangers organize themselves into semi-nomadic squadrons that engage in all manner of petty crimes and public disorder. Although their social hierarchy is rather loosely defined and egalitarian, any Capganger that loses his or her cap is bereft of their magical powers and regarded as a pariah by other members of their race. Worse still, if any being manages to steal or otherwise acquire an individual Capganger's hat, that Capganger is effectively rendered an indentured servant of that person.

 

Next monster...

 

[Selfsurprise]

^^^ Bouquecoo, Medium Usually N Aberration (Shapechanger)

The colloquially named Bouquecoo is a highly specialized shapeshifting creature that is capable of disguising itself as numerous varieties of domesticated houseplant in appropriate manufactured potting. They typically target larger households with large gardens, and despite being capable of taking on diverse array plant and receptacle traits individual Bouquecoos tend towards conservative habits. Left to their own devices and unless compelled to by coercion or circumstance, most Bouquecoos will manifest their abilities by transforming into the same arrangement of flowers, typically of the same kind and colour, with most favouring vase-like "bodies" to compliment their ruse.

Their real form vaguely resembles the outline of an oversized bouquet of flowers in a lumpen, upright cylindrical body covered in mustard-coloured greasy fur. A rasping multi-jointed "tongue" projects from the base of the body and immediately below that are it's disarmingly cartoon-like boggled eyes. The mass of the creature sits atop a intertwined circular bed of writhing green tendrils.

 

Next monster...