Share your feelings!

[Blightmare]

@Rarity: If talking to people wasn't a good coping mechanism, psychologists would be out of a job!

Precisely my point.

 

OT: Jittery. I had espresso. Not my smartest move today.

[Jeb_CC]

I was hoping to do some stuff today, but nope, all those plans flew out the friggin' window. XD

I couldn't even sit down and play five minutes of my Civ 5 game without having to attend to something. Dammit! However, at least I have a games night tomorrow. Going to chill at my mate's house, play some sweet as board games and just have fun in general - so I really can't wait for that! Weird thing is, he's my mate (who's like, in his 30's), and his wife is the administrator at my school. XD So we're all very close to each other in a really strange way. XP

 

In summary, kinda tired, but I have stuff to look forward to so...

[Seattleite]

I feel confused and ashamed, mostly confused. I seriously offended a girl in public today. We were on the bus, and I noticed she had a Math 110 book with her. And I seriously could not believe it was hers, I thought it must be an older sister's or something. So I asked her about it, and she responded "Yeah, it's mine. Why wouldn't it be mine?" Stupid me, I had to open my mouth again and say it. "Because you look, like, 12." While I was dead serious and not exaggerating a bit, I seriously thought she was 12, she took exception to that. She then very loudly stated that she was 18 and that just because white people are terrible at determining other people's ages doesn't mean she looks 12, called me a racist (slightly hypocritical of her) and got off the bus. And I am still processing that.

[BTGBullseye]

@BTG:

Here you go. XP

 

I meant the spider...

[Blightmare]

It's in there somewhere I'm sure.

[Jeb_CC]

@BTG/Rarity: XD LOL, I mean, I misunderstood you, BTG, but Rarity has a point.

 

@Seattleite: As long as you didn't mean to offend her, it's fine! No need to feel terrible over it, I'm sure she'll get over it soon anyway. X3

 

OT: I'm having a serious doubt session... I keep thinking; "It's not good enough! I can do better!" But I have a deadline to meet. I'm happier with this animation than the older one by far, but it's still not perfect!! Grrrr... Does it look good? Does the music fit? Is something wrong? Is everything okay? Is the plot reasonable? Does it work? Ugh. So many mental questions, driving me crazy. I need someone to slap me and tell me it looks fine. Half of me says that, but the other half says there's something wrong. Fuck off other side. XD

[Vapymid]

Slap you? *swings his hand... Pats lightly on your shoulder* Sorry, can't do that

 

But, hey, you have the normal jitters of a talented person... Always find imperfections in your own work and think you can improve... But only gods do perfect things. For humans - better is a mortal enemy of good enough. Just like jumping into a pool - you just have to hold your breath and step forward...

 

Have faith in your talent and judgement - if only because some other people already do

 

Regards

[Blightmare]

As bad as it feels from the first-person, I always viewed the imperfectionist mindset as a rather healthy mindset. Without it we wouldn't have drive to get better at something, or at least not much of one. If all those years at college showed me anything, it's that "good enough" became "dropping out" because everyone who worked only to the point of "good enough" had ended up being no better than they were when they started 2 years before. Don't beat yourself up too much over that, it's beneficial in the long run.

[Vapymid]

Well, if they were dropping out they obviously weren't good enough, which kind of defeats your argument, don't you think?

 

I'd say the distinction there is that between practicality and indifference... There is no danger of Jeb suffering from the latter - that's for sure!

 

Regards

[Blightmare]

Well, if they were dropping out they obviously weren't good enough

 

On the contrary. The school was an art school focused on game design (primarily 3D and engines) and considering I'm a programmer who was making his own 3D models for his game, 2 years should have been more than enough time for the actual 3D artists to learn their craft, identify their weaknesses, and work to overcome them and get better. But people in my SENIOR THESIS class were turning in work of the same quality and effort I saw back in Intro to 3D.

 

Their problem wasn't that they weren't good enough, it was that they had quite literally no motivation and no drive. A lot of people went there because they were mislead by the prospect of video games, not understanding that to make a game you need more than just a good idea and half a thought.

 

Also if I sound like I'm ranty, it's residual frustration and disappointment with my graduating class and friends seeping through. I know they were and are capable of doing extremely well but most of them would rather sit in the library swearing at League of Legends than working to secure a successful future. :/

 

I'm still awestruck by the modeler that showed up to Senior Thesis 1 with less models than I had, and I made 2 games to put those models in. -.-

 

 

Also to clear the air a little, at that school, "good enough" usually meant "Bare minimum" and by bare minimum I mean N64.

 

There is no danger of Jeb suffering from the latter - that's for sure!

Thankfully. XD In fact I'd say her work is already ahead of my graduating class.

 

If it needs any more pointing out, OT: A bit ranty lol.

[Jeb_CC]

Thankfully. XD In fact I'd say her work is already ahead of my graduating class.

After having two other people say my work was good, then you posting this, I literally just burst into a weird mix of happiness and tears. XD Aww... why thank you! Age 16 and better than a graduating class? I'll take it! :3 Thank you! Even if they are a bunch of no-hopers as you describe them to be. XP

I find my motivation comes from the satisfaction of creation... after completing a drawing or composition, I will look or listen to it for like... hours. XD I'll stick through 3 hours of drawing, for the satisfaction of calling something mine for the next century and forever. I also like doing stuff for other people, that motivates me too. If you've got a major goal in creative work, you're pretty much set for life. XP If you can't find some goal or drive in creative arts, don't bother learning it!! XD If you want to master like... piano playing, just for the sake of calling yourself a pianist, stop. Pack your bags, leave Italy, don't come back. XD

...Well there was my mini rant.

[Zaraki]

I feel conflicted on a lot of stuff recently.

Should i be happy,angry or sad?

I just don't really know how to fix myself.

[Reverend_UshankaCat_]

Be happy. It's more fun that way

[Binky The Rabbit]

Do something active to vent the anger.

Think about why you're sad, see if you can learn anything from it, or find a solution.

Be happy that you're smart enough to do those things.

[AP_Pastor]

Find a way to relax, man. Try listening to some relaxation audio, they might help.

 

Speaking of which, I'm gonna listen to some later. I've been getting anxiety attacks lately

[Jeb_CC]

I'm kinda tired... But I don't really have a right to complain when I'm the one forcing myself to be tired. X3 I need to sleep more... Have more naps or something. Just kinda hard to sometimes. But oh boy, I'm tired and a day full of classes and work, AND I'm going to have a nerve-wracking meeting with one of the teachers to sort some of my course work out. Eeesh...

[BTGBullseye]

Feeling quite good... Just got fish for my fish tank, and now I'm about to go make a pizza for dinner.

[Binky The Rabbit]

Feeling alright. Getting a bus at 5am (in 3 hours' time) for London, might get some coffee on the go.

[Jeb_CC]

Feeling alright. Getting a bus at 5am (in 3 hours' time) for London, might get some coffee on the go.

 

Oh hey, when I visit the UK one day, you should come to London. XP Or I'll come to you. We can have a mini party. A party of two. XD But Vappy lives in the UK too!

 

OT: Just had a meeting with one of the teachers in regards to my education. X3 Not fun. So nerve-wracking. Stuff hasn't been sorted, but at least she knows what's up. So that's progress.

I'm just wishing I was hoooome... XD I'm so done with school for this year.

[AP_Pastor]

Would love to go to UK someday too, I'd like to live on my own there.

 

OT: Feeling emotionally shattered. I just saw my grades, and it's my worst. To add salt in the wounds, apparently i'm the only one in my class who flunked so bad.