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"Corrupt a Wish"

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Wish granted, but every other restaraunt goes out of business

 

I wish for the Omnitrix

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Granted, but you can only turn into one creature.

 

I wish Brexit actually happened and wasn't overturned by Anti-Democratic remoaners

Non Nobis Domine, Non Nobis, Sed Nomine, tuo da Glorium

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Granted, but you have to make it up in your bosom

 

I wish that I had the Excellence of Elocution

Non Nobis Domine, Non Nobis, Sed Nomine, tuo da Glorium

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Granted, but it appears everywhere else, including your house, in your bedroom, so you can't sleep from all the headbanging

 

I wish to be as badass with a guitar as Yngwie Malsteem, able to play guitar solos with my teeth

Non Nobis Domine, Non Nobis, Sed Nomine, tuo da Glorium

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Granted, but your fans wont leave you alone

 

I wish for my own private army

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Granted, but they have to go against the Point Man.

 

I wish I had golden flowing locks of hair metal

Non Nobis Domine, Non Nobis, Sed Nomine, tuo da Glorium

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Granted, but it takes ages to maintain!

 

I wish for retractable, razor sharp claws in my hands.

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Granted, but they hurt like hell every time they come out, and they break from being used to shave your legs too much.

 

I wish Ainsely Harriott came back to Australia to entice us all with his spicy meat

Non Nobis Domine, Non Nobis, Sed Nomine, tuo da Glorium

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Granted, but he cooks himself...

 

I wish I was in the land of cotton.

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Granted, but you're allergic to cotton

 

I wish the Star Wars Expanded Universe was deemed cannon over Disney's bullshit nue trillogy

Non Nobis Domine, Non Nobis, Sed Nomine, tuo da Glorium

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Granted, but Disney goes out of buisiness

 

I wish That a game with A.I. better than F.E.A.R. would come out

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(F.E.A.R.'s AI isn't that smart though when you break it down)

 

Granted, but it's like F.E.A.R. 2

 

I wish that Bungie made another Halo game that's as good as Halo Reach

Non Nobis Domine, Non Nobis, Sed Nomine, tuo da Glorium

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Granted, but it doesn't have dual wielding or playable elites.

Or Martin O'Donnell writing the soundtrack.

 

I wish sonic team would make an actually good 3d sonic game.

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Granted, but it doesn't have dual wielding or playable elites.

Or Martin O'Donnell writing the soundtrack.

Wouldn't be a Bungie game then.

 

Granted but you have to play as Shadow the Edgehog

 

 

I wish Hunt Down The Freeman was actually well made

Non Nobis Domine, Non Nobis, Sed Nomine, tuo da Glorium

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Granted, but valve buys it and slaps 'half life 3' on the title to make money

 

I wish Ronnie James Dio didn't die.

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Granted but he doesn't make music anymore

 

I wish these taffers had respect for such, beautiful things...

Non Nobis Domine, Non Nobis, Sed Nomine, tuo da Glorium

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