"Corrupt a Wish"

[Psychotic Ninja]

Granted, you're killed by fire instead

 

I wish I could fly

[Zaraki]

Granted,but you can't fly down.

 

I wish I could stop feeling hungry.

[Psychotic Ninja]

Granted, you stop feeling hungry. You stop eating. Not wanting to eat, because you always feel full, even though you're not, you die of starvation.

 

I wish I could travel through time

[SCZephyrinus]

Granted, but it takes forever.

 

I wish I had a bunch of crappy superpowers.

[Selfsurprise]

Granted, they are so awful that superheros with better powers come after you out of sheer pity.

 

I wish I knew what I wanted to wish for.

[TheTron852]

Granted, but your mind shattered from the knowledge.

 

I wish for an even better thermal adaptability than what I have right now.

[Zaraki]

Granted,but you feel nothing.No cold and no warmth.

 

I wish my food could talk to me.

[Psychotic Ninja]

Granted, but only you can hear it, and people think you're crazy.

 

 

I wish I had the ability to control the weather

[Zaraki]

Granted,but you can't leave Earth anymore.

 

I wish I was dead.

[Psychotic Ninja]

Granted, but you respawn 10 seconds later

 

I wish I had enough money for a new top notch gaming PC

[TheTron852]

Granted, but then you spend it all on other things

 

I wish for a Dragonpocalypse

[Psychotic Ninja]

Granted but it only lasts a few seconds, before everything goes back to normal, the way it was before the Dragonpocalypse hit.

 

 

I wish a corrupt politician became president forever.

[Zaraki]

Granted,but that politician starts a war.

 

I wish I had a comfier bed.

[Psychotic Ninja]

Granted, it's so comfy it sucks you in, absorbs you, and you can never leave.

 

 

I wish no one enters my contest

[Reverend_UshankaCat_]

Granted, nothing makes you laugh. Ever again.

 

Granted, it's so comfy it sucks you in, absorbs you, and you can never leave.

There was a movie with that premise, I think it was called "Death Bed" or something!

 

I wish people would stop telling me to get a driving licence.

[Selfsurprise]

Granted, but this year all of your loved ones simultaneously get the idea to give you a car for christmas. You now own dozens of cars you can't use!

 

I wish I was the world's greatest didgeridoo player.

[Zaraki]

Granted,but the didgeridoo gets stuck on your mouth forever.

 

I wish I had a bag of peanuts.

[Reverend_UshankaCat_]

Granted, here's your bag of penis.

 

I wish I could adjust my facial hair with my mind

[Psychotic Ninja]

Granted, but your mind's an immature asshole, and turns your facial hair into things like a dick, the Hitler 'Stache, among other things.

 

I wish customers stopped coming in in the fucking morning on Saturdays.

[Zaraki]

Granted,but now no customers arrive anymore.

 

I wish I had a turtle shell.