"Corrupt a Wish"

[BTGBullseye]

Granted, you are now fictional.

 

I wish things wouldn't happen.

[Scampi]

Granted, but now nothing happens.

 

I wish I could sleep in the Accursed Farms barn for a night.

[BTGBullseye]

Granted, but you never wake up.

 

I wish my laptop had a GTX 980m instead of a GT 630m.

[Binky The Rabbit]

Granted, but a RAM module blows a chip when you next boot up.

 

I wish the world could be more focused on space exploration.

[Scampi]

Granted, but in our haste to the stars we neglect safety protocols.

 

I wish my damn 3d printer stopped jamming.

[Zaraki]

Granted,but your 3D printer takes a sentient,robotic form turning into a killing machine.

 

I wish I found unreleased soundtracks.

[danielsangeo]

Granted, but they're all terrible and that's why they were unreleased.

 

I wish I could get paid without working.

[Reverend_UshankaCat_]

Granted, but you get paid in scratched Windows 95 installation CDs.

 

I wish I had Vin Diesel's voice.

[BTGBullseye]

Granted, but a RAM module blows a chip when you next boot up.

Perfectly fine by me, I have spares.

 

I wish I had Vin Diesel's voice.

Granted, but then Vin Diesel gets mad at you for taking his voice, and goes full Riddick on you.

 

I wish I would be gifted $4 million by some rich old guy in his will, and have it not be contestable by anyone.

[Binky The Rabbit]

Granted, but you later find out it was a specific grant that you didn't spend according to the criteria, and now the Bank is comin' fo' yo' ass.

Perfectly fine by me, I have spares.

"Good thing I was a boy-scout. Be prepared!" (extra points for getting the reference )

 

 

I wish job-hunting wasn't so demoralising.

[BTGBullseye]

"Good thing I was a boy-scout. Be prepared!" (extra points for getting the reference )

That's the boy scout motto, but it's totally useless compared to the Civil Air Patrol ground team system of "Don't just be prepared, be prepared for things that could actually happen.".

 

I wish job-hunting wasn't so demoralising.

Granted, it's more demoralising.

 

I wish the previous statement wasn't true.

[Scampi]

Granted, but it will be when you need it not to be.

 

I wish I could control my movements at maximum speed with the same level as if they were slow.

[danielsangeo]

Granted, but but nothing else has that control at that speed so you are unable to carry any liquids in any open-mouthed containers without spilling.

 

"Good thing I was a boy-scout. Be prepared!" (extra points for getting the reference )

 

Doom Guy's Mind: Episode 7.

 

OT: I wish people wouldn't feel the need to gun their engines outside my bedroom window like they're at a racetrack...

[BTGBullseye]

Granted, instead they fire various firearms at all hours.

 

I wish theatre tickets were a lot cheaper.

[Reverend_UshankaCat_]

Granted, but now everyone in the theatre checks their phone every thirty seconds.

 

I wish unhealthy food wasn't so tasty.

[Malhek]

Granted, now all foodstuffs are flavorless.

 

I wish i could travel to a dimension similar to our own where people havent charted all of the known world.

[Binky The Rabbit]

Granted, but you don't get to explore the uncharted areas.

 

I wish the Futurama tube system was real.

[Psychotic Ninja]

Granted, but it never works.

 

I wish gaming wasn't such an expensive hobby.

[BTGBullseye]

Granted, now it's really inexpensive, mainly because there is only one game, and it's total crap. Also, it has the legal right to any form of game, so if you even attempt to make a game of any sort, you're fined millions.

 

I wish life was better.

[Reverend_UshankaCat_]

Granted, but human life expectancy is now 12 years.

 

I wish I knew what

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6qyvbSKH-Wg was called.